Dark Match:
DM1: The Discyples vs.
C&S Express
In a short lived match, the
newest addition to the IEW tag ranks, The Disycples, destroyed Ching and
Scehize with a double spinebuster for the 1-2-3.
On air event:
(The shows opens to a very different merchandise stall that has been built in the arena corridor. Strange as the sign above that reads ‘Merchandise stall’ looks as though it has been prepared with a sharp knife on a plank of rotting wood. It has. The goods balance on strategically placed barrels. Heyfish Demonio, and Gerald stand guard over the loot, until someone passes and takes interest. That man is Sean Dubose.)
Heyfish: Arrrghh! Lad! What ye see is genuine merchandise straight off the shelves from IEW headquarters. It's not pirated....
Sean: Really?
(He begins to study the first few items)
Demonio: Ya see we has got many authentic IEW relics.
(He points out what seems to be a finger.)
Sean: What’s this?
Gerald: Rizzo’s missing pinky finger!
Sean: That’s sick guys!
All Dogs: Arrrrggghhh!
Sean: I’ll take five!
(The transaction is done.)
Demonio: We has a lot more on offer! Rizzo Mutton Chops….Jars full of Boca Del Inferno Talent….
Sean: Boca talent? Is it empty?
Heyfish: Aye!!!!!
Sean: Is their any need for the jars?
Heyfish: Nay! We just like that joke.
(Sean looks at more things on display)
Gerald: Behold, over there we have your very own Walkers peaks and false beard.
Sean: False beard?
Heyfish: Aye, no man has the stomach to try and pull the real one off her face.
Sean: And if that wasn’t enough Leigh Beido has kindly supplied Vaginal Growths.
(Small furry creatures are indicated, and they look adorable.)
Gerald: That she has!
Sean: I see you have some DVD’s too, and Videos…..
(He notices one, ‘The Best of the Salty Dogs’….)
Heyfish: Aye, it’ll be out sometime……
(Sean knows full well that it won’t.)
Gerald: Give it time boys.
(Sean notices that the Dogs all wear really awesome head gear.)
Sean: Where did you get those cool head scarves?
(Heyfish indicates a box at the back labeled ‘IEW Headquarters’ and Demonio kicks it open. It’s full of Dream Team T-shirts. Sean then notices the T shirts on sale.)
Heyfish: Aye, we’ve found a better range of merchandise.
Sean: I’ll have a bandana too!
(He looks up to a T-Shirt that says ‘Beware the salty Dogs!!!!!’ written in red. Despite the fact the Dogs don’t have T shirts yet….)
Heyfish: Here take a T-Shirt too lad!
(Sean takes one and puts it on; on the back it clearly shows that it’s a Downfall shirt. He notices a skull and cross bones jockstrap, and points to it. Demonio gives it to him.)
Demonio: Aye, especially fur ye!
(Sean turns to leave.)
Sean: It’s a pleasure mateys.
(And the final moments all men share one last exchange.)
All: Arrrrrrggggghhhh!!!!!
Brutus: What the hell did we just watch?
Jimmy: Good question. That was funny though, whatever it was.
(“You Can Hate Me Now (instrumental)” by Nas plays over the PA, as Khrystal Walker comes out onto thestage. She's wearing her business suit. She gives alook of disdain to the people at ringside, and walks down to the ring to the boo's of the crowd. She's holding a mic.)
Brutus: Okay, who gave her a microphone?
Walker: Cut my music. Thank you. Now I'm sure most of you saw Full Throttle. I told all of you I was taking the World Title. So, I was wrong. Big deal. He used a crowbar to set up the brass knucks. A regular Kansas City shuffle. That's good for him, he's still the champ. The bad for him, is I'm still moving, I'm still breathing, and I'm still hungry for gold! So I am asking... no, I am DEMANDING that Downfall come out here and hand that title over.
(The crowd boo's. Walker looks to the stage, but nobody comes out. She gets a little frustrated.)
Walker: It figures... some people talk a good game, but in the end, they are just cowards. It doesn't matter, Downfall, I had you at Full Throttle, I can beat you any time, anywhere.
(Walker laughs, and turns to the crowd, who boo her fiercely, and then "Man or Animal" by Audioslave hitson the PA. Downfall comes out onto the stage in his ring gear, the World Title slung over his shoulder.)
Downfall: Whoa whoa whoa whoa WHOA. Hold up there,
Walker. Did you just say... you had me at the pay-per-view? (He chuckles) Which one was that, the pay-per-view that never happened? Now, sure, you got your licks in, but at the end of the day, you were knocked out, and I was walking tall and standing proud... STILL the World Heavyweight Champion. (He smirks) So much for your guarantees, huh?
Walker: Again, no big deal, what you don't get there DF ol' buddy, is that if you hadn't used more cheats than a Mafia accountant, you not only wouldn't be champion, you wouldn't even be on my radar. Face it Downfall, you're just a piece of ---
Downfall: I'm sorry to interrupt your hypocritical rantings, but you saying that gives me an idea. Why don't you shut up for one thing, and then we put that to the test. You said you could beat me any time, anywhere. On May 14th, from Detroit, the IEW is having a pay-per-view called Unholy Ground.
Walker: That's all cool. But I don't want to kick your ass in just any match. I want there to be no more surprises, no more Inner Circle or any kind of outside help. I'm going to force you to either be a champion, or what we all know you are, a loser gangbanber. That way, when I walk away with the World Title, you will only be able to say "Well, I ain't the only one who lost to the One Bitch Army.."
Downfall: One, stop. Two... I dunno, how hard did I hit you with those brass knucks? Wake up Walker, I needed no help to beat you at Full Throttle. And three, fine by me. And since you want to talk about "no help, no escape", why don't we just eliminate all that from the equation? Why don't we make it a steel cage match?
Walker: Steel cage, huh champ? (Turns to the crowd) How about it? Do you people want to see the One Bitch Army, the Queen of Freaks versus Downfall with nohelp from the Inner Circle jerks? One on one, in a steel cage?
(The crowd gives a very large pop. Downfall grins at her, and shrugs, and says "you heard the people")
Walker: I'm not stupid enough to play another man's game, till I see the odds, but I'll think about it.
(The crowd boo's, and Downfall rolls his eyes.)
Walker: I'll have to think about the cage match part of it... But as to the match itself...I'm not giving you a choice. You will never be rid of me until you can beat me straight up, and I know, you know, and all these ungrateful bastards who won't support some one who's got the nerve to stand in her own boots know, you might as well hand over that belt now, champ, it will save you some pain, blues, and agony.
(Downfall and Walker stare each other down for a good long time.)
Brutus: Next week is going to be GREAT!
Jimmy: Well here we are for this anticipated match up.
Brutus: Anticipated? I wasn’t waiting for this.
Jimmy: Brutus, I mean between these two competitors whose match against one another seems to have been delayed numerously.
Brutus: True. But, I’m sure the Ace will just beat Underdogg.
Jimmy: We’ll see Brutus.
Mic: The following contest is scheduled for ONE FALL. Entering first weighing in at 253 lbs and hailing from Augusta, Georgia. Here is “THE ACE” CHRIS BOOTH!
*"Woke Up This Morning" by Alabama 3 plays over the PA system as Chris Booth arrives through the curtain carrying his trademark 7 Iron. He takes a couple of practice swings as he makes his way down to the ring. He climbs in the ring and takes a few more practice swings before putting his 7 Iron in his corner.*
Jimmy: Knowing people like Chris Booth, He’s probably going to use that 7 iron on Underdogg.
Brutus: Oh come on Jimmy. Maybe this time he won’t.
Jimmy: Oh just shut it Brutus.
Mic: And his opponent, hailing from Washington DC and weighing in at 198lbs, he is also being accompanied to the ring by his wife and Secretary, Jennie Warner. Here is UNDERDOGG!
* The arena lights go dark and a video of a live concert plays. The lead singer yells:*
"It's time.... to Kick out the Jams Mother f***kers!"
*"Kick Out the Jams" by MC5 booms through the arena and Underdogg steps out onto the entrance ramp wearing an old school Washington Senators baseball cap over his mask and carrying a Shinai Bamboo Sword/Kendo Stick. Jenny Warner follows him out. He does a few speedy formations with the stick and tosses it backstage.*
"Well I feel pretty good
And I guess that I could get crazy now baby
Cause we all got in tune
And when the dressing room got hazy now baby"
*Keeping his pace relatively slow, he starts walking down the ramp high fiving some of the crowd members, keeping his eye on the ring. He throws a punch to the camera at the bottom of the ramp and slides into the ring. He holds the ropes open for Jenny as she enters the ring.*
I know how you want it child
Hot, quick and tight
The girls can't stand it
When you're doin'it right
Let me up on the stand
And let me kick out the jam
Yes, kick out the jams
I want to kick'em out!
*Sarge poses in the ring with Jenny and then tosses his hat into the crowd. He goes into a corner and warms up while Jenny gives him some encouraging comments.*
Jimmy: Underdogg, getting some last minute encouragement from his wife.
Brutus: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well let’s get this over with.
*Underdogg helps Jenny to the outside, as Chris rushes Underdogg from behind. Jenny gets to the floor as Chris just begins hammering Underdogg in the back.*
DING! DING! DING!
*Chris keeps pummeling Underdogg. Underdogg pushes Chris off and runs towards him. Chris just executes a belly to belly suplex which knocks the ref out of the ring to the floor.*
Jimmy: Underdogg just got used to knock out the ref onto on the floor.
Brutus: YES!
*Chris gets up and grabs the 7 iron. He then walks over to Underdogg and begins wailing on him. Jenny runs to try and shake the ref to get him up. Then she just gets in the ring and gets between Underdogg and Chris.*
Jimmy: Oh… I told you he was going to use that club Brutus.
Brutus: He’s just doing what is necessary to win.
*Chris just tosses the club out of the ring, pushes Jenny out of the way, and continues pummeling Underdogg. She tries to go stop Chris, but the ref gets in the ring and sends Jenny to the back. She tries to argue, but to no avail. She heads to the back.*
Jimmy: Oh sure. NOW the ref is back in.
Brutus: HA! HA! HA! That’s just funny.
*Chris eggs Underdogg to get up. Then Underdogg gets up and Chris puts Underdogg in his shoulders like a torture rack and then Chris spins him and drops him in a powerbomb and makes the cover.*
Brutus: YES! He calls that the Hole in One Jimmy.
Jimmy: It wouldn’t have happened if he played by the rules.
Brutus: Oh bite me.
1…
2…
3…
DING! DING! DING!
Mic: And the winner as a result of a pinfall is “THE ACE”… CHRIS BOOTH!
Jimmy: And another person who uses underhanded tactics picks up the victory.
Brutus: Hey if Underdogg was so good then he wouldn’t have let that happen.
Jimmy: Whatever and let’s go on with tonight.
Brutus: Okay Jimmy.
The referee raises Booth’s hand as Underdogg leaves the ring, Booth climbs outside the ring and picks up a mic.
Booth: Cut the damn music
His Theme the stops playing as he rolls back into the ring
Booth: What, for about a month now, I’ve been telling everyone I was gonna beat this chump up and down this ring and I think I just proved I’m a man of my word. So this brings me to my next point, earlier this week I issued an open challenge to anyone in the locker room for a match this week if Underdogg didn’t turn up.
He pauses for second, soaking in the jeers
Booth: Well he did turn up, but, I don’t think we can call what just took place a match, so my challenge still stands, if anyone back there has got the guts, bring your ass out here to face the Ace!!
He waits for a few moments but gets no reply
Booth: Just what I thought, a bunch of gutless wonders, well this challenge still stands, so next week, I’ll be back to call anyone out
“Woke up this morning” plays again as Booth tosses down the mic and leaves the ring
Jimmy: What an arrogant little punk. Obviously, he’s going to go off and bite off more than he can chew.
Brutus: He had an impressive showing tonight. Who knows what he could do against other guys in IEW.
(The camera opens to a shot of a Jolly Roger flag. In the background an accordion sea chantey plays. The camera slowly zooms out as viewers see a sign underneath the flag with the words “Captain Hinegrinder’s Plunder Talk”. Suddenly A pirate-clad Trevor Adams, complete with a fake beard, bandana and plastic sword jumps in front of the camera.)
Adams: YAAAAAAR!
(Shayne Cross, with a cheesy moustache and goatee, and a big black pirate hat and eye patch jumps in from the other side.)
Cross: ARRRRRRGH!
(Adams stops at looks at Cross, breaking “character”)
Adams: What the hell was that? Argh? Are you Charlie Brown?
(He looks back into the camera.)
Adams: Yarrrrrrr maytees and welcome to the very first and last episode of Captain Hinegrinder’s Plunder Talk. I be the captain and this be my first mate E.P. Lackey!
Cross: Yarrr!
Adams: Say Lackey. Why couldn’t the pirate go to the pirate movie?
Cross: Yarrrr I don’t know.
Adams: Because it was rated arrrrrrrr!
Cross: Har har har! Tis a good one captain! How much did it cost the pirate to have his ears pierced?
Adams: Yarrr I don’t know.
Cross: Arrrrr... A buccaneer!
Adams: Yaaaaar but I’ll go you one better.
Cross: Aye?
Adams: Aye! How many defeats is it going to take E.G. Mackie to realize he’s a joke of a performer?
Cross: I wish I knew the answer to that captain. Maybe ye can answer it for me?
Adams: Avast! The answer lies in but two letters. The letter T and the letter A. The very same letters that if ye can read books you’d be able to see stands for Trevor Adams. He’s the yarrrinist Intercontinental champion that ever has sailed the seven seas and it’ll be a cold day in hell before he gets sent to walk the plank and visit Davy Jones’ locker!
Cross: Ahoy!!
(Adams looks at Cross with a “what the f*ck” look.)
Adams: That means hello you idiot.
Cross: Oh uh… Weigh anchor or I’ll give you a taste o’the captain’s daughter!
Adams: Arrrr that be better. Now we’re going to count down the top ten pirate pickup lines. Got it? Top ten pick up lines for ye olde sea hags!
Cross: Smartly Captain, I’ll raise a grog to that! Number ten!
Adams: Avast me beauty! Wanna see why my Roger is so Jolly?
Cross: Number nine!
Adams: Ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
Cross: Number eight!
Adams: Come on up and see me urchins!
Cross: Yar that be a belly shaker. Number seven!
Adams: Yes, that is my hornpipe and I am happy to see you.
Cross: Number six!
Adams: I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
Cross: Yarr har har. Number five!
Adams: Hide the little sea urchins for this one… Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
Cross: Number four?
Adams: How’d you like to scrape the barnacles of me rudder?
Cross: Harr har har! Number three?
Adams: Ya know darlin’ I’m 97 percent chum free!
Cross: Number two!
Adams: Well blow me down?
Cross: Arrrrr har har! And the number one pirate pickup line?
Adams: Prepare to be boarded!!
Cross: Yarrrrrrr!
Adams: Oh I almost forgot something Lackey.
Cross: Yar? Ya did?
Adams: Yeah… I forgot the above all else number one pirate pickup line.
Cross: What might that be?
Adams: My name is E.G. Mackie. Care if I plunder your boot… Forget it. I’ve had enough…
(Suddenly Adams rips off the beard and bandana and throws down the sword. His eyes glare directly into the camera and his lower lip quivers slightly.)
Adams: Mackie I know you’re here somewhere and I know you’re watching. Do you see you damned foolish you look? Do you realize that THIS is what people see every time you’re on TV? THIS is what people think of you when they think of IEW. It’s people like you who tarnish the reputation of this business I hold so near and dear. Tonight E.G. Mackie you and I are going one-on-one for the very first time. If you’ve got the guts you’ll bring your ass down to the ring, drop the charade and look me in the eyes like a man. If you don’t… the world is going to see that yellow stripe running down your back that everyone around here has known for a long time existed.
(Adams turns away from the camera for a moment, takes a deep breath and looks back.)
Adams: Your time is now E.G. Step up to the plate my friend, because what you have in front of you is the challenge of all challenges. You didn’t ask for this match I know it. I asked for it because the rest of the people in this organization don’t have the balls to walk right up to me and tell me they want a shot. You make a good showing Mackie and I promise you you’ll get a shot at what I have. You’re thinking why would I do that? Because I know I’m going to beat you tonight, and I know I would beat you in a title match. There’s nothing to be concerned about when the outcome is already elementary. Alas I have but one suggestion for you and I’m pretty sure you know what it is….
(Adams looks at Cross, then back into the camera with a steely glare.)
Adams: Deal with it.
(The scene closes on a closeup of the Jolly Roger as Adams rips it down off the wall.)
JR: Now this next match coming up, pound for pound, is the biggest event of the evening.
B: Yeah, Jimmy. These two titans, Gulgamek and Hightower, will clash in what should be a colossal match!
*Lights go out in the entire arena, not one shimmering light can be seen. Out of the silence a bell toll can be heard, then another, then another. Slowly mist spews out from both sides of the entrance way. A lightning bolt shoots from the top of the ceiling to the entrance way sparking off a huge pyro explosing as For Whom The Bell Tolls by Metallica starts to play. The video screen comes to life showing a gloved hand slowly reaching through the mist. A bright white light shines from the entrance way, the only light in the entire arena. The video screen shows the massive shadow of a man standing in the light, soon thereafter the same is found in the entrance way itself. Slowly the shadow makes its way down the aisleway complete encased in shadow due to the light behind him. As he gets closer to the ring it becomes clear that its Gulgamek with Charles Childs in tow.*
Mic: Introducing first, weighing in at 365 pounds, GULGAMEK!!!
*He stops for a moment at ringside, looks up at the top rope. He reaches up pulls it down and climbs onto the apron. He slowly swings one leg after another over the top rope and into the ring. Childs walks confidently up the metal stairs and climbs through the ropes and into the ring alongside of Gulgamek. The lights come back on as Gulgamek stares down at the official waiting his confrontaion to begin.*
I'm a little insane
I'm a little deranged
I got this take stuck in my heart
Eyes filled up with rage
Haven't slept in 10 days
But it's the fuel need and I will rise above
Blood in and blood out
And don't you ever f***ing let me down
Mic: And his opponent, making his way to the ring and weighing in at 450 pounds, HIGHTOWER!!!!
*"Blood in, Blood Out" by Bloodsimple fades in on the PA as pictures of Hightower's past matches appear on the IEW-tron. Shots of Hightower using his great strength. Then, Hightower walks out onto the stage, and throws his hand up (like Big Show) and screams something to the crowd. He stares at the ring with great intensity, then walks slowly down to the ring.*
DING DING DING!
JR: The ref signals for the bell and this match is under way! Hightower goes straight for Gulgamek with a clothesline. Gulg ducks and responds with a HUGE chop to Tower’s chest.
B: Tower must be red from that chop! Gulg comes back for another chop, and another!
Crowd: Wooo!
JR: Even the fans are getting into it. Gulg whips Hightower into the ropes, and plants a Big Boot right into Tower’s face!
B: Tower falls down to the mat hard. Gulg jumps up and lands a leg drop onto Tower’s neck. I think the ring shook a little! Are you sure this can hold up these two giants, Jimmy?
JR: I’m sure Ms. Valiant made this ring double sturdy. She is ready for anything these men can dish out on one another.
B: Gulg picks Tower up, but Tower elbows him in the gut a few times. Tower somehow picks Gulg up for a sidewalk slam with authority!
JR: Tower may have broken his back to execute that move, but I think it’s worth it. Gulg seems to be down for the count. Tower makes the cover.
Ref:
1...
2...
Kickout!
B: That was a close one! Gulg may not survive much longer here. Tower grabs Gulg’s face and begins mounted punches.
Crowd: 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... 8... 9........
*Hightower winds up for the last punch...*
10!!!!!!!!
JR: Tower may have taken Gulg’s head off with that last punch! Gulgamek is in trouble.
B: Tower now ‘helps’ Gulg to his feet slapping him along the way. Then Tower picks Gulg up for a scoopslam.
JR: Tower has now taken complete control of this match. Tower seems to be waiting for Gulg to get up, signaling for the Triple Decker. How on Earth is he going to pull this move off?
B: We may not be able to find out, because C Childs is making his presence known to Hightower! He is up on the ring apron giving Tower a few choice words. Tower seems to ignore Childs... But suddenly Tower lunges toward him with an over-the-top clothesline that sends both men out of the ring! Childs is seeing stars as Tower uses the guard rail to help him back to his feet.
JR: Hightower turns around to see... Gulgamek lunging over the top rope in a suicide dive! Folks, I have never seen a man so big do a high risk maneuver such as that, but in IEW, there’s a first time for everything!
B: That was insane! Gulg and Tower are both down as the ref is checking up on C Childs who seems to be okay. Gulg gets up first and executes a Russian leg sweep on Tower, who now favors his head. Tower crawls to the ring apron but Gulg is close in tow. Tower then reaches under the ring in desperation. Gulgamek doesn’t seem to notice and just pounds away at Tower’s back with axehandle smashes. Tower finally stands up and pulls out a trash can lid and connects with Gulgamek’s head!
BONG!!!
JR: Where is the ref??? That should be a DQ right there!
B: The ref is still tending to Childs and didn’t see a thing.
*Hightower throws the trash can lid into the stands before the ref comes over, obviously suspecting foul play. The ref is on the outside warning Hightower but he puts his hands up as if nothing happened. Hightower rolls the prone Gulgamek into the ring. Hightower climbs back into the ring to continue his assault on the now weakened Gulgamek. *
JR: If the ref had only seen what Hightower just did this match would be over!
Brutus: Well he didnt and the match is not over yet JR!
* Gulgamek stumbles to his feet and right into Hightower who gribs his neck. Hightower hoists him up and nails the Hang Time. *
JR: Hang Time...unfortunately this match might be over for Gulgamek...what a shame.
* The ref finally slides back into the ring behind Hightower. Hes holding something in his hand. Its revealed to be a crow bar. He sneaks up behind Hightower and low blows the big man. Hightower is in pain. *
JR: Wait a minute!
* Hightower turns around still favoring his southern region. The ref drops the crowbar, rips off the wig and begins to peel off what appears to be a rubber mask. *
JR: I thought i had seen everything!
* The mask is off and its " The 7th Angel" Adam Chastane in disguise. He laughs in the face of Hightower. Gulgamek has recovered behind him and takes down the big man with a clothesline. The partners look at each other. Chastane points upward giving Gulgamek the signal. *
JR: I think i know whats coming!
Brutus: Now how is this fair?!?!
* Chastane heads to top rope as Gulgamek struggles to get Hightower perched on his shoulders. Chastane leaps off quickly to spell his partner and they nail From Heaven To Hell shaking the ring. Gulgamek covers. Chastane drops to count......
1...........................
2.............................
3............................
DING! DING! DING!
(Redd Dogg makes his way into the ring and he grabs a m
ic.)
Redd: Hightower, Sorry about your match. But now, I'm going to ask you to go to the back.
(Hightower asks him what he's talking about.) Just do it man, please. And whatever happens, let me handle it on my own.
JR: Downfall has laid down a challenge to Redd Dogg tonight, to prove his worth to the Inner Circle.
(Hightower tries to talk to Redd for a second, but Redd says "I have to do this myself." Finally, looking a bit confused, Hightower makes his way to the back.)
Redd: Downfall gave me a test tonight. He said that I need to prove myself. And you know what, he's right. I can see where I have been the weak link in the Inner Circle chain. I was a former TV and Tag Team Champion but in recent weeks, well, I haven't been taking anything seriously. And it's cost my teammates. So here, tonight, y'all are gonna see the old Redd Dogg come out. It's time I got back to doing what I joined up with the IC to do... kick ass. Tonight isn't about joking around, it's not about raps... tonight, I am challenging anybody in that backstage area to come out here. Anybody, I don't give a f**k if it's Underdogg or Jaye Doyle. Get out here and...
(Suddenly, the lights go out.)
JR: What is this?!
(Redd looks around, confused, as the lights come back on, and "Greasepaint and Monkey Brains" by White Zombie hits on the PA. Redd stares at the entrance ramp, in disbelief, as Sicko comes walking out onto the stage.)
JR: Oh my god, it's Sicko! It's Sicko!
Brutus: What the hell, I thought he was in a mental institution!!
(Sicko makes his way down to the ring. He slides in, and walks right up to Redd Dogg, breathing heavily, an intense look on his face. Redd looks around, not knowing what to do. He tries to punch Sicko in the face, but Sicko's head just snaps to the side, and he is unfazed.)
Brutus: Well, nice knowing ya Redd.
(Redd punches Sicko again, to the same effect. Redd tries one more punch, but Sicko grabs his hand and starts crushing his fingers. Redd tries to pull away, but Sicko squeezes, and Redd's fingers are crushed. Sicko doesn't let go, instead pulls Redd closer, and headbutts him, hard. Redd drops, and Sicko hauls him back up and drops him with another stiff headbutt.)
Brutus: Well, he did want a fight... he was better off hoping for Underdogg, though...
(Sicko irish whips Redd to the ropes and when he comes off, Sicko drops him with a monstrous big boot. Sicko lifts Redd again, whips him into the corner, and comes in with a big splash, crushing Redd. He backs up, gets a running start, and comes in with another splash. Redd staggers out of the corner, and Sicko grabs him around the throat, lifts him in the air with one hand and pumps him a few times, then drops him with a devastating chokeslam.)
JR: Sicko is dissecting Redd Dogg, but why?!
(Sicko lands a leg drop across the throat of Redd, then pins him.)
Brutus: What? Is this a match?
(Sicko slaps his hand one... twice... then he pulls off the "cover", and lifts Redd Dogg up, lifting him up in a vertical suplex. Sicko then spins around a few times and drops Redd with a jackhammer.)
JR: Under the Big Top!
(Sicko slaps his hand on the mat three times, signalling that it's over. He holds his hands up in victory, and gets a mixed reaction, a lot of boo's, but some cheers as well. But then, he climbs out of the ring and goes to the announce table, and screams "get out of my way!!" and grabs a chair. He climbs back in the ring with the chair, and as Redd Dogg is slowly crawling to his feet, Sicko wraps the steel chair around his head. Redd falls, bleeding heavily from his forehead. Sicko holds up the chair, and stares at Redd intensely.)
JR: This isn't right, Redd Dogg wanted a fight, I got that, but he's helpless now!!
(Sicko wraps the chair around Redd Dogg's leg, all the way up to the knee. He grins sadistically, and then he stomps on the chair, putting all of his weight into it. Redd screams in pain, and holds his shattered knee.)
JR: Oh my god!! Redd's leg has been crushed!!
(Sicko goes to stomp on the chair again. Suddenly, Hightower comes flying down the ramp, enraged, and he gets set to climb in the ring.)
JR: Hightower has come to avenge his fallen friend, and get take out this psychotic clown!!
Brutus: I don't know if the ring can support these two big monsters, but then it just had a match between Gulgamek and Hightower so it should be fine.
(Warpath suddenly comes out with a mic.)
Warpath: Hightower, wait a minute. Wait a minute, dammit!!
(Hightower stares at Warpath, rage all over his face. He's still on the apron, about to get in the ring.)
Warpath: Look big man, calm down. I know Redd was your friend, but face facts... he was a cancer. He was dragging the Inner Circle down. He is the reason people see us as a joke. Well, the joke is over. I brought Sicko in here. Because with him and us together there is nobody the Inner Circle cannot dominate. The time for jokes and raps is over, Hightower. Now shake Sicko's hand.
(Sicko and Hightower stare each other down. Sicko grins insanely, and Hightower gives him a glare, and glances at Redd, lying broken and bleeding on the mat.)
Warpath: Shake his hand Hightower, because Sicko's not just our newest Inner Circle member... he's also your new tag team partner.
(Hightower looks shocked, and Sicko gives him a grin. Hightower turns away from him, and signals to the back for the refs to get some help for Redd Dogg. Warpath tells Sicko to come on, and he grabs Hightower's shoulder and says "let's go". Hightower, looking pissed, walks after Sicko and Warpath up the ramp as the EMT's attend to the fallen Redd Dogg.)
The Mic: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is to determine the #1 contenders to the IEW Tag Team Championship. Coming to the ring first, they hail from Sudbury, Ontario, Canada and they weigh in at a combined 509 pounds. Here are Deth and Razor… Deth Squad!
"How many people wanna Kick Some Ass!"
*As the opening riffs play a stream of fireworks shoot towards the entrance way and explode along with a loud crash of guitars and drums. Razor and Deth step out from behind the curtain to a chorus of boos. They appear to be mouthing off to the crowd as they make their way down the ramp to the ring. The big screen shows shots of Deth and Razor in their return to the IEW as masked men, and shots from the battle royal. The enter the ring still yelling out at the crowd amongst the boos.*
"How many people wanna Kick Some Ass... I do... I do"
*Both men then focus in on the upcoming match.*
The Mic: And their opponents weigh in at a combined weigh of 514 pounds. Here are Crocodile and Lion… Beastly Squad!
*The arena goes dark as "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns N' Roses is played over the PA system. On the titantron, a split screen one of a zebra in the savannah and the other with a gazelle drinkin from the river. When the beginning words of the first verse begins, the titantron displays a lion biting the neck of the zebra on one side and a crocodile biting and dragging the gazelle into the water on the other, as one blast of pyro goes off and The Beastly squad walks out into the open. As, Lion and Croc walk to the ring, the titantron shows Lions and Crocs individual finishing and signature moves, and their tag moves. Lion and Croc then climb up on the apron directly across from the entrance ramp. Lion enters the ring with one leg over the top rope at a time and croc climbs on the top turnbuckle on the side with the ring steps attached. As Lion does his singles roaring type of thing Croc backflips into the ring as green, yellow, and red explosions of pyro and green flames(for turnbuckles only), as well as pure white flames on the entrance ramp and turnbuckles(shared with green flames) erupt throughout the arena. At the same time, the roar of a lion and hiss of a crocodile bellow throughout the entire arena.*
Jimmy: Razor’s coming off a tough loss against Malachi. Hopefully for him his anger won’t cloud his judgment.
Brutus: Worry not. Lion and Croc won’t be able to work together, so it’s all gravy.
*Tina Garcia calls for the bell and the match gets under way. Deth and Lion stay in the ring as their partners climb to the apron. They circle the ring and then they lock up. Deth applies a headlock and he quickly spins it into a hammerlock. Lion hits him with a back elbow smash. Lion bounces off the ropes and he clobbers Deth with a clothesline. Deth gets up and Lion assaults him with a series of boots. Lion goes to whip Deth into the ropes but Deth reverses it. Deth takes Lion down with a back body drop. Lion gets up and Deth hits a few rights to the face. Deth scoops Lion up and he slams the man to the mat. Deth picks Lion back up and he applies an arm wrench. He pulls Lion over to the corner and he tags in Razor. Razor climbs on the top rope as Deth holds. Razor drops down and he drives an elbow into Lion’s arm. Deth lets go and he climbs out. Razor stomps away at Lion’s arm just before applies an armbar. Lion grabs the rope quickly but Razor doesn’t let go. Tina counts. 1… 2…3 … Razor lets go and he backs away as Tina scorns him. Razor goes back over to Lion. When he bands over, Lion hits a hard right that stuns Razor. Lion gets up and he follows up the punch with a European uppercut. Lion grabs Razor and he hits another European uppercut. Lion whips Razor into the corner. He walks over and he tags in Croc. Croc gets in and he lays the boots to Razor’s midsection as Lion exits. Croc pulls razor out of the corner and he executes a vertical suplex. Croc stands up and he pulls Razor to his feet only to take him right back down with a side Russian legsweep. Croc stands up and he lands a quick legdrop to Razor’s throat. Croc covers.*
Jimmy: Surprisingly, things are going well for the dysfunctional Beastly Squad.
1…
2…
Kickout.
Brutus: Not good enough it seems.
*Croc stands up and he drags Razor to his feet. Razor rakes Croc’s eyes and then he hits a snapmare. Razor sits Croc up and he connects with a low dropkick to the back of the head. Razor gets up and he tags in Deth. Razor and Deth both pick Croc up and Irish whip him. Deth Squad decks Croc with a double elbow smash followed by a double elbow drop. Razor exits as Deth continues the assault. Deth lifts Croc up and he hits a series of chops that backs Croc into a neutral corner. Deth grabs the middle ropes and he rams his shoulder into Croc’s midsection. Deth scrapes Croc off the turnbuckles and he whips him into the opposite corner. Deth charges right into a boot from Croc. Deth stumbles backwards and Croc explodes out of the corner with a spear. Croc picks Deth up off the mat and he executes a side suplex. Croc stands up and he tags in Lion, who hesitates before entering. He glares at croc and then turns his attention to Deth. Lion boots Deth in the head as he gets to all fours. Lion stands Deth up and he hits a hard punch to the face. Lion gets a hold of Deth and he hits a reverse mat slam. Lion picks Deth back up and he drives the big man down with a DDT. Lion covers.*
Brutus: Lion’s on fire. That big win against Matt Rison has definitely put some wind in his sails.
1…
2…
Kickout.
Jimmy: But so far, it looks like neither team is willing to concede.
*Lion drags Deth to his feet and he hits a scoop slam. Lion drops a knee on Deth’s forehead and then he proceeds to dig it in. Lion gets back up and he stomps Deth in the head. Lion slaps on a front headlock. Lion pushes down with his weight and he tries to cut the oxygen off from Deth’s head. As Deth stars to fade out, Razor jumps in and boots Lion in the head. Tina pushes Razor back. As she does so, Lion applies an illegal choke. Razor sees this and tries to save Deth, but Tina pushes him back He exits the ring and Tina turns around just after Lion lets go of the choke. Lion gets to his feet and he peels Deth off the mat. Lion grabs Deth with both hands around the throat and then he tosses Deth to the mat. Lion covers.*
1…
2…
thr Kickout.
Brutus: Damn that was so close!
*Lion drags Deth to his feet. As he’s being pulled up, Deth sneaks in a low blow that the ref doesn’t catch. Deth gets up and he lands a headbutt. Deth tags in Razor. Deth picks Lion off his feet as Razor climbs to the top. Razor flies and they drop Lion with a spiked powerbomb. Razor goes for the cover as Deth leaves.*
1…
2…
croc runs in and makes the save with a quick elbow drop on the back of Razor’s head.
Jimmy: Croc just saved Lion from the pinfall! That match would’ve been over!
Brutus: Lion took a hell of a lot more punishment than that last week.
Jimmy: Exactly. He’s already beaten and worn down. This just adds to damage already done.
*Croc gets attacked by Deth as razor gets back up. He picks Lion up and whips the Anarchy champ into the corner. Razor charges and he flattens Lion with a corner splash. Razor grabs Lion by the head and he drives Lion into a mat with a Tornado DDT. Tina finally gets Deth and Croc out of the ring as Razor goes for the pin again.*
Jimmy: Razor’s really taking his aggression out on Lion, eh?
Brutus: Are you making fun of Canadians?
Jimmy: What ever do you mean?
1…
2….
Thr Lion gets his foot on the ropes.
Brutus: What great presence of mind by Lion.
Jimmy: Yeah, he’s lucky that he was close enough to the ropes. Otherwise we’d be seeing Deth Squad face off against Dream Team.
*Razor gets up and he gives Tina piece of his mind. As he berates Tina, Lion starts to come to. Razor turns around and he gets destroyed by a running lariat by Lion. Lion picks Razor up and he whips him into the corner. Lion tags in Croc who enters. The duo kick Razor in the gut and then takes him down with a double flapjack. Croc picks Razor up and he follows the flapjack up with a mat slam. Lion exits the ring just as Croc lands a forearm drop on Razor’s head. Croc picks Razor back up and he pounds Razor in the face with several knee strikes. Croc whips Razor into the ropes and he drops Razor face first into the mat with a drop toe hold. Croc rolls razor over on to his back and then he nails a fist drop to the head. Croc covers.*
1….
2…
thr Kickout!
Jimmy: Another VERY close call! This time, Croc almost took out Deth Squad!
*Croc stands up and he drags razor to his feet. Croc sweep Razor off his feet and he drives Razor down with a backbreaker. Croc lifts razor back up and he executes an Irish whip. Croc catches Razor and he flattens the man with a spinebuster. Croc covers again.*
1…
2…
thr Deth runs in and kicks Croc in the head, breaking up the count. Lion rushes in and he attacks Deth. Deth and Lion spill to the outside as Croc gets to his feet. Croc stands Razor up but Razor rakes Croc’s eyes. Razor gives Croc another eye rake and he follows up with a knife edge chop. Razor goes to whip Croc into the ropes. Croc reverses it and he sends razor into the ropes. Razor holds on as Croc goes for a dropkick. Outside, Deth grabs a hold of Lion by the head and he smashes Lion’s face into the steel post. In the ring, Cro gets up and Razor punishes him with a superkick.*
Jimmy: Close Shave by Razor!
Brutus: And Lion’s out on the floor right next to us!
*Deth rolls into the ring. Razor picks Croc up and he executesan Irish whip. Razor and Deth destroy Croc with a flapjack/neckbreaker combo.*
Brutus: D-Squad Breaker! This one is OVER!
*Razor covers and Tian counts.*
1…
2…
3!!
(DING DING!)
The Mic: The winners of this match… Deth Squad!
Lion goes and grabs the Anarchy Title and slides it into the ring. Then Lion grabs a chair and throws it in. Then Lion goes under the ring and pulls out his bloodied barbwire baseball bat. He also pulls out a table a gas can and a blow torch.*
Jimmy: Not again!? Is there no stopping Lion!? Lion is going to set Deth Squad on fire.
Brutus: YES! I’ve been waiting for this.
*Lion eggs Deth to get up and he clocks him with the Anarchy belt. Razor begins to stir and goes after Lion. Lion sees him and gives him a kick in the gut before slamming his head with the belt. Lion then grabs his bat and puts the title down. Razor is the first to raise as Lion just smacks him in the head drawing blood. Then Deth gets up and rushes after Lion and just receives a strike in the gut before getting a baseball swing upside the head, which again draws blood. Then Lion grabs the chair and hoists Deth up. He just gives him a vicious guillotine with the chair. The he picks up Razor and does the same. Then Lion sets up the table, as Croc starts to stir. Lion then pours gas over the table and Deth Squad, who are out cold. Lion then takes the lighter and stares at it. Croc gets to his feet and looks with shock at the carnage Lion has caused. Lion then sets the table on fire. Lion then goes and picks up Razor and Deth by their throats, one in each hand. Each one is out cold.*
Jimmy: OH NO! Lion is out of control.
Brutus: Oh Boy! Here it comes. Oh man, not Croc.
*Croc gets ot his feet and he stand between Lion and the flaming table. Croc tries to talk Lion out of it.*
Jimmy: Finally, Croc has come to talk some sense into Lion.
Brutus: Lion warned Croc about this.
*Lion with one thrust tosses Razor and Deth to the side and gets in Croc’s face. Then Lion and Croc exchange words. Lion just gives Croc a stiff boot to the face which pushes Croc back enough to where he touches the table and then let’s out a yell as he takes it off. Lion then puts croc in a full nelson then he executes a Lion’s Fury, but during the second Full Nelson he puts Croc and himself through the flaming table. The flames seemed to engulf them as the EMT’s rush the ring to tend to Lion and Croc.*
Jimmy: Sweet Jesus. This is INSANE!
Brutus: No, Lion is insane. But hey, that’s what Croc gets for interfereing.
Jimmy: That’s not right at all!
(The scene cuts backstage to Rizzo’s locker room. In it is Rizzo who is sitting back relaxing. The door booms with a knock. Rizzo answers it and Titan is standing in the doorway. Rizzo motions for him to come in. Titan obliges and the two start talking.)
Tian: Interesting theory you had this week.
Rizzo: What can I say? It makes the most sense if you look at it logically.
Titan: It does, but…. I don’t know. You’d think they’d be bragging about it.
Rizzo: Good point. They do like to point out how much of a bunch of cowards they are. Kind of strange. It’s like they’re proud to be yellow.
Titan: Anyway, I want to come by and say thanks for saving Doyle that night. Nice to know you have his back.
Rizzo: Any time man.
(Titan turns around to exits, but something catches his eye. He sees Rizzo’s bloody chair hanging up. He walks over and looks at it.)
Titan: Still using this thing?
Rizzo: It’s never failed me in the past.
Titan: What the…
(He takes the chair off the wall andl oosk at something very closely.)
Titan: When did you ever use this on me?
Rizzo: Never have… why?
(Titan shows Rizzo that his blood is also marked on it.)
Rizzo: What the hell?
Titan: In fact, this looks pretty recent. You have a lot of explaining to do.
Rizzo: What the hell are you babbling about? I didn’t’ do that. And if you think… whoa hey, come on now.
Titan: This makes PERFECT sense. You took me out, and then you went out and became the hero of the night Typical Rizzo. Always looking our for number one.
Rizzo (getting agitated) At least I’m not a Big Dog’s number 2.
(Titan wastes no time in slamming the chair into Rizzo’s face. Titan picks Rizzo up and he lifts him up in a gorilla press. Titan throws Rizzo and he hits the concrete wall with a loud, sickening thud. Titan picks Rizzo up by the head and he throws Riz through the door and into the hallway. )
Brutus: What an idiot! Rizzo should’ve disposed of the evidence.
Jimmy: This makes no sense! Rizzo had no reason whatsoever to attack Titan.
Brutus: Tell that to Titan!
(Titan walks out into the hallway and he picks Rizzo up. Titan proceeds to throw Rizzo into the wall again. Titan drags Rizzo down the hall to the catering table. Titan boots Rizzo hard in the gut and then he plants Rizzo into the table with a powerbomb. Titan surveys the damage and then he walks away from the scene. It cuts back to Jimmy and Brutus.)
Brutus: That bastard got what he deserved.
Jimmy: I’m not so sure. I can’t believe that Rizzo would randomly attack Titan like that.
Brutus: You heard the big an. Rizzo wanted to be in the limelight as the hero. Hell, I wouldn’t doubt that he PLANNED this with Inner Circle.
Jimmy: Bullcrap! Hopefully we’ll find out for sure what happened very soon.
(The scene changes to see Malachi and Jonah walking down a backstage corridor, to which the crowd in the arena goes wild. Malachi has the IEW Light Heavyweight Title over his shoulder, walking confidently.)
Jonah: You know I've never seen you with this much of a spring in your step my man.
Malachi: Well can you blame me? Not only am I here in the great city of DAAAAAAAAAAALLAAAAAAAAAASSSS!!... (the crowd goes wild yet again).... but last sunday, in front of a capacity crowd, I literally climbed the ladder of success and became the FIRST.... IEW Light Heavyweight Champion! I proved I am the toughest, smartest, most agile guy in this company who doesn't weight more than of a cow, and claimed (he pats the title belt) THIS championship, my championship... so yeah, (he puts on his trademark smirk) I think I have a damn good reason to have a spring in my step!
Jonah: So, what you got planned for tonight?
Malachi: Well seeing as I wasn't scheduled to be in a match tonight, I thought I might as well grace the audience with the presence of the only credible champion in the company, and add to what will already be one HELL of a show!
Jonah: Heh, alright then champ, just don't get carried away.
Malachi: (thinking to himself for a moment) .... heh.... "champ".... I think I'm gonna like being called that.
Jonah: (smiling) Of course, now all you've gotta do is work hard to keep that thing in your possession!
(Malachi stops dead in his tracks, and turns to Jonah, who has also stopped suddenly.)
Malachi: Oh Jonah, always looking towards the positive side of things!
Jonah: (smirking) Well, someone's gotta keep you on track. Look, I gotta go check on some stuff, but I'll catch up with you after your grand speech.
Malachi: Sure thing. Later Jonah.
Jonah: (walking in the other direction) Have a blast!
(Malachi then continues to walk down the corridor, with the camera following him. After a good few seconds, all of a sudden, one of the doors along the corridor opens as Mal walks past it, and from behind the door DarkDragon emerges like a blot of lightning, and spears Malachi to the ground before unleashing an array of punches.)
JR: Dear god! DarkDragon is assualting the Light Heavyweight Champion!
Brutus: I know! Isn't it great?
(Getting to his feet slowly, he calls someone out from within the room, which turns out to be a referee. DD then kneels besides Malachi, and begins to talk to him.)
DarkDragon: Malachi, the game now truely begins. Are you ready? I hope you are ready, because the first part of my gauntlet to prove your worth.... is a hardcore match!
(DD then picks up Malachi by dragging him by the hair, and as Mal gets to his feet, DD throws Malachi headfirst into the wall, causing him to fall right back to the ground.)
JR: Malachi has no way to defend himself! He was totally unprepared for this!
(DD once again grabs Malachi by the hair, and drags him along the corridor, with the referee in pursuit. Suddenly, DD sees a steel chair, and upon seeing it, sends a knee to the mid section of Mal, winding him. DD uses this moment to grab the chair and with an almighty force, hits Mal over his back with it not once, but twice.)
Brutus: Oh god, this is great! Don't stop DarkDragon, don't stop!
JR: This is just sick, they guy is just jealous because he couldn't stop Malachi last sunday!
Brutus: What a load of crap! He's beating up that sorry piece of crap because he deserves it, and that's all there is to it!
(DD then picks up Mal by his hair a third time, and this time drags him for quite a distance. All of a sudden, the two go through a set of double doors, and as the camera follows, it shows that the two men are amougst the rear of the audience on the ground, causing the entire arena to go nuts.)
JR: I think this is going to get far more ugly.
Brutus: *laughes evily*
(DD turns Malachi around, and hits him with a dragon suplex, followed by another, and then another, with the audience looking on in horror. DD stands there for a moment admiring his handywork as the audience boos him heavily. All of a sudden, DD bursts back into action, grabbing Malachi and dragging him through the audience. As they reach the security barrier by ringside, DD sets Mal up for a powerful irish whip, and with a huge push, send Malachi flying over causing the audience boo even more. DD then jumps over quickly, and grabing Malachi's head, drags him over to the ring post.)
JR: Oh come on! Enough is enough!
(Looking at the ringpost, DD slowly pulls Malachi up, and then with all his might he sends Malachi's head into the ringpost, sending a loud "OUCH!" throughout the audience. As the camera looks over Malachi, it shows he is now busted open.)
Brutus: This more than makes up for Malachi winning the title! But wait, there's more!
(DD picks up Malachi again, and rolls him into the ring. As he goes to climb in, the crowd begins a "Mal-a-chi! Mal-a-chi!" chant, causing DD to become more enraged. As he stand up in the ring, he goes to pull up Malachi once again. However, with a sudden burst of energy Malachi lunges out with an uppercut causing DD to stumble backwards. He then launches himself to spear DD and take both men to the canvas, causing the audience to sudden burst into a cheer.)
JR: Just as we thought Malachi was done, he comes out with this! What amazing endurance!
Brutus: Come on DarkDragon, finish him already!!!
(Malachi then begins to unleash a flurry of punches to DD. However, DD suddenly pokes Mal in the eyes, causing him to reel backwards, and with Mal's back turned, DD hits him with a low blow, sending Malachi back to the canvas. With the boos now back and stronger than ever, DD suddenly looks upwards and signals to someone up in the roof.)
JR: What the hell is is doing now?
(From up in the rafters, a hook and rope is lowered on a cable into the middle of the ring. Dragging Malachi into the middle of the ring, DD then grabs the rope, and ties Malachi's legs up before attaching them to the hook and securing it. He then makes another signal, and the cable begins to go up again, enough to leave Malachi hanging off the ground. DD then goes outside and reaches under the ring, and pulls out, to a loud chorus of boos, a baseball bat.)
JR: Oh come on!! Malachi is defenseless!! Somebody stop this!!!
Brutus: Why should they? As Darkdragon stated, this is a HARDCORE match! And he's certainly made it hardcore!
JR: Well I certainly wouldn't say he's made this a match! It's a god damn set up! He had this all planned from the start!
(DD then approachs Mal with the bat in hand. He then grabs the bat in both hands, and takes a swing at Malachi's mid section.)
JR: This is just not right!
Brutus: Again Darkdragon, again!!
(DD then takes a swing at Mal's back.)
Brutus: Another!
(DD takes another swing at Mal's mid section.)
Brutus: One more for the road!
(DD then takes the bat, and charges it at Malachi's head (HHH sledgehammer style.) As the crowd continues to boo louder than anything they have been so far, DD sends another signal to the rafters, and the cable lowers, making Mal crumple up on the canvas. DD then calls over the referee, who relucatantly gets in. DD then covers Mal. After a few seconds just standing there, DD yells at the ref to count, and the ref begins to coun the pin.)
1 .....
.....
.....
......
2 ......
......
......
......
3!!!!!!
DING DING DING!!!
("Whatever It Takes" by P.O.D starts playing as DD stands in the middle of the ring, his arms raised up in triumph. Meanwhile, the crowd are now booing louder than anything, sinkened by what they have just seen as Malachi lies there only moving slightly, although clearly unable to get up. All of a sudden, from up the ramp, Jonah comes running down with a look of absolute rage on his face. DD by this point has rolled out of the ring, and climbed back over the security barrier, before walking through the crowd. Jonah, realising he has to look after his friend, stops pursuing DD and tends to Malachi, shouting for EMT's to come to the ring.)
JR: This has got to be one of the most pathetic and sickest moments I've seen in a while.
Brutus: You know, even I think he went too far in the end.
JR: (confused) Say what?!
Brutus: ...... (he suddenly starts laughing) Oh GOD! I'm sorry, I couldn't keep that up for much longer! Of course I'm lying, what just happened was GREAT!!!
JR: Oh whatever. What just happened was sick and wrong, and I've got a feeling next week Malachi is going to want to get some serious payback against DarkDragon when they face off against each other.
Brutus: Finally Trevor Adams is going to shut up that no good good-for-nuthin’.
Jimmy Rollins: I highly doubt that Brutus. Win, lose, or draw E.G. Mackie is one man with lots to say.
Brutus: You can say that again.
The Mic: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. On his way to the ring… from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada… he weighs in at 252 pounds and is the IEW Intercontinental champion…. “Class Act” TREVOR ADAMS!
(The opening chords to “Clubbed to Death” by Rob D ring out through the building. Fans jump to their feet in anticipation. The lights in the arena drop with the exception of the entrance, bathed in gold and a throbbing white strobe. The familiar figure of Trevor Adams appears in the entranceway, his body in the shadows, but the IC title shining around his waist. As he slowly steps forward the figure of his agent, Shayne Cross appears behind him with a grin on his face. Clearly proud of his client. Adams raises his arms in triumph as he walks down the aisle. Several silent streaks of pyro fire off in time with his movement. The crowd boos loudly
and he just grins. Cross mouths off to various members of the crowd as Trevor keeps his eyes on the ring showing nothing but pure intensity.)
Brutus: Look at that face! Look at that intensity. That man has a look that says I hate pirates!
JR: I kinda like them you know.
Brutus: You
would!
(Trevor slowly approaches the ringside area, a white spotlight raining down on him from the back of the building. The ring is bathed in gold as he makes his way up the stairs. Shayne Cross pulls himself up onto the apron and through the ropes, pushing The Mic out of the way for Adams. Trevor slowly strides to the far turnbuckles, pulls himself up and raises the IC title belt high above his head. Boos reign down from the rafters of the building but cameras flash by the thousands. The lights slowly come up.)
The Mic:
hailing from Kirkcaldy, Scotland. He stands at 6’5” and weighs in at 140 lbs… E.G. MACKIE!!!(The arena is filled with the sound of gulls calling along the coast, then to break the calm 'Ghost Love Score' By Nightwish begins to loudly play. Upon the giant screen there is a flag gently blowing in the wind. There is a Jolly Rodger, with patches over both eyes, and crossed spoons. Imprinted on the forehead is a single letter…..`M. A caption written in bones says, ‘Arrrgh! Beware The Salty Dogs’, but there is no E.G. Mackie.)Brutus: I hope Adams knocks the weirdness out of Mackie tonight.Jimmy Rollins: (Chuckling.) Well
that’s doubtful.Brutus: A man can dream can’t he? I think Mackie might know what trouble he’s in for tonight. I don’t think Mackie is even going to show.
Jimmy Rollins: There’s no way Mackie would bail on a match. He’ll fight anyone and everyone. He’s done that his whole career and tonight should be no different.Brutus: He’s never had to fight anyone with the skill and talent of Trevor Adams though. I think the pirate has chickened out.
Jimmy Rollins: Now Brutus, he’s not Downfall. E.G. Mackie will be here and he’ll thump Mr. Adams when he does.(Adams is strutting around point to himself and wants the referee to start up a count. Pops begins to count out Mackie but Adams interrupts the count and wants Pops to raise his hand already. Pops refuses and Adams begins jawing with Pops. Pops finally puts Adams in his place and begins the count again. Pops reaches five again when Mackie swings in from the second tier of the crowd with a knife in his mouth and a cannon ball under his arm. Mackie tosses the cannon ball at a surprised Adams as he lands on the canvas, hitting Adams square in the chest and knocking him flat
on his back. Mackie spits out the knife and heads right for Adams.)Jimmy Rollins: The ever flamboyant, E.G. Mackie, totally takes the Intercontinental Champion by surprise. Brutus: Am I the only one who thinks using a cannon ball should be an immediate disqualification?(Mackie drags Adams up and whips him off the ropes. Mackie heads for the other ropes and hits a springboard forearm on Adams, taking him right back down to the canvas. Mackie rolls back up to his feet and drags Adams back up again. German suplex by Mackie. Mackie holds on and rolls them both back up to their feet. Another German
suplex by Mackie and he still holds on as the two roll back up again. Mackie picks Adams up for another German suplex but instead walks over to the corner and sits him up on the top turnbuckle. Mackie is panting for breath after that offensive barrage but heads out to the apron.)
Brutus: Trevor still hasn’t recovered from that cannonball attack but it looks like Mackie might have spent himself with all those power moves.
Jimmy Rollins: I doubt it. Mackie is the strongest little big man in our profession.
Brutus: With any luck he’ll be the deadest little big man when all is said and done tonight.
(Mackie is up on the top rope but receives a punch to the midsection by Adams. Adams begins to regain his composure and hits another stiff shot to the solarplexes. Adams nails an uppercut and Mackie is wobbling. Adams stands up on the turnbuckle and doubles Mackie over then takes him into the ring with an underhook superplex. Both men are laying in the ring and Pops begins to count; 1… 2… 3… 4… and Adams rolls back up to his feet. Adams approaches Mackie who is up to one knee, and helps him the rest of the way. Short-armed clothesline by Adams and Mackie is back down to the mat. Adams helps Mackie back up to his feet and runs off the ropes.)
Jimmy Rollins: That was a massive superplex by Trevor Adams to reverse the momentum here but Euan is still standing which amazes me to be honest.
Brutus: He won’t be standing for long.
Jimmy Rollins: Don’t be so sure.
(Adams comes back at Mackie with a springboard dropkick off the second ropes but Mackie sidesteps it and pushes Adams feet away. Running knee lift by Mackie takes Adams back down. Mackie then hops on Adams and hooks in an STF Dragon Sleeper. Adams is wildly gesticulating to try and break the hold but begins to fade as he struggles less and less. Adams looks like he’s going under and Pops checks his hand;
It goes down once…
It goes down twice… suddenly Mackie’s eyes get as wide as saucers and he releases the hold immediately holding his forearm. Adams rolls over and is grinning maniacally while Mackie complains to Pops. )
Brutus: You just can’t keep the Intercontinental Champion down. Mackie thought he had him there but a great reversal by Trevor broke the hold.
Jimmy Rollins: A great reversal? He just bit Euan for cryin’ out loud!
Brutus: Well Pops didn’t see anything like that and I didn’t see it either. I think you’re just making this up.
(Adams gets back up to his feet and Mackie rushes him with a clothesline. Adams ducks and runs for the opposite ropes. Adams and Mackie meet at full steam in the middle of the ring and Adams creams Mackie with a spear. Adams gets back up to his feet and picks up Mackie’s feet. Adams goes for the sharpshooter and he cinches it in. Mackie immediately comes back to life and begins pounding on the mat for mercy. Mackie turns his pounding on the mat to pounding on Adams’ ankle. Mackie forces himself up in a pushup then does a forward roll, sending Adams stumbling backward over Mackie and down to the mat.)
Jimmy Rollins: Great reversal by Mackie.
Brutus: What the?!? Mackie quit! I heard him! This match should be over!
Jimmy Rollins: Euan did no such thing and no it looks like he’s regained control in this affair.
(Mackie then grabs the ankle he was beating on and locks in an ankle lock. Adams is in immediate discomfort but quickly reaches out and grabs the bottom rope. Both men roll back up to their feet. They circle each other then lunge in for a lockup but Mackie drives a boot to Adams’ midsection to buckle him over. Mackie runs off the ropes and hits a tornado DDT. He then hooks the leg to cover;
1…
2… and Adams kicks up. Mackie rolls up and Adams struggles to his feet. Mackie kicks Adams in both knees and Adams falls to his knees. Mackie then grabs Adams in an arm-bar, arching him backwards.)
Brutus: I can’t believe Trevor is letting Mackie do this. He should just stop messing around and end it already.
Jimmy Rollins: I don’t think Mr. Adams is letting Euan do anything.
Brutus: Well how else would Mackie be doing what he’s doing?
(Mackie lifts his leg over Adams and drops a leg on him mid arch. Mackie rolls Adams over and hooks the leg;
1…
2…
Thr… and Adams kicks out. Mackie drags Adams up and goes for a big right but Adams blocks it. Mackie goes for a big left but Adams ducks it and hits a quick T-Bone suplex. Adams hops back up to his feet and hops up to the second rope. Flying elbow drop by Adams. Adams quickly hooks in an STF of his own. Mackie is gesticulating wildly but Adams has it good and cinched. Mackie begins to dig in and crawl, amidst obvious pain, towards the rope.)
Jimmy Rollins: I can’t believe this. In obvious pain, Euan is somehow managing to drag himself and the much bigger Adams towards the rope. What drive! What determination! What intestinal fortitude!
Brutus: What bullshit! That Mackie is definitely on some sort of performance enhancing drugs.
Jimmy Rollins: How dare you make such outlandish statements, Brutus!
(Mackie is still struggling for the ropes and is inching closer and closer. Finally, Adams releases the hold and nails Mackie with a double axehandle. Adams drags Mackie up and whips him into the turnbuckle. Mackie walks up the turnbuckle and flip back over Adams. Adams turns while following Mackie in the air but gets nailed with a DDT as Mackie lands that sees Adams flip right over and land on his back. Mackie hops back up and out of the blue starts doing The Matrix. Mackie then climbs up to the top rope and comes down in an angled shooting start press. Mackie nails it then hooks the leg for the cover;
1…
2…
Thr…)
Jimmy Rollins: Great move there by Euan but it wasn’t enough to keep Adams down.
Brutus: He can’t keep the Intercontinental Champion down. He just doesn’t have what it takes. He should just give up now.
Jimmy Rollins: Mr. Mackie does not just give up.
(Mackie drags Adams up and drags him into a corner. He goes to smash Adams’ face into the turnbuckle but Adams blocks it. Elbow to the gut by Adams and he drives Mackie’s face into the turnbuckle. Mackie staggers out but Adams follows. Adams grabs Mackie and spins him around. Adams sets Mackie up and delivers a fisherman suplex. Adams drags Mackie back up then says something to Pops and points into the crowd. Pops looks and Adams nails Mackie with a low blow. Mackie flops to the mat and Adams covers. Pops looks back to see Adams covering Mackie and drops to the mat for the count;
1…
2…
Thr… and Mackie just barely musters up enough to kick out.)
Jimmy Rollins: That was a dirt trick by Trevor Adams. He should have been disqualified.
Brutus: What, and the cannon ball to the chest was okay? Besides, Pops didn’t even see that so that doesn’t count.
Jimmy Rollins: Well obviously it didn’t because this match is continuing.
(Adams drags Mackie up and goes for a Russian leg drop but Mackie blocks it. Snapmare by Mackie and he runs off the rope for a dropkick to Adams’ back. Mackie walks around and picks up Adams’ legs. He looks like he’s going to make a wish but instead he drives a boot t the inside of Adams’ leg. Mackie does this again… then again. Mackie drags Adams over to the ropes and stretches the leg of focus out across the bottom rope. Mackie hopes up to the second rope, bounces a few times, then leaps and drives his butt down into Adams’ prone knee. Mackie does this again… and again. Mackie then drags Adams out into the middle of the ring.)
Jimmy Rollins: Euan is starting to focus on Adams’ knee now. This might not bode well for our Intercontinental Champion.
Brutus: Are you kidding me? That Mackie is walking right into Trevor’s trap.
Jimmy Rollins: And what trap would that be, Brutus? Getting his behind handed to him?
(Mackie goes for a figure four but Adams shoves him off. Adams goes to get up but lays down as Mackie bounces back off the ropes and runs over Adams. Mackie bounces off the ropes again but is taken down with a snapmare by Adams, right into a Cobra Clutch. Mackie struggles a little but quickly fades, then slumps as Adams tightens the hold. Pops checks his arm and it goes down once…
It goes down twice…
It goes down three times but Mackie immediately drops to his butt and breaks the hold with a jaw breaker on Adams.)
Brutus: What the? Mackie’s arm went down three times. This match should be over. Trevor Adams has won!
Jimmy Rollins: Try telling that to Euan.
Brutus: Maybe I will.
(Adams staggers away from Mackie and Mackie bounces off the ropes. Mackie hits Adams with a chop block on Adams’ already damaged knee. Mackie drags Adams by the foot over to the corner then slides out of the ring. Mackie grabs Adams’ injured knee and drives it into the steel post. He does it again… and again. Mackie then goes for a figure four around the ring post but Adams shoves him off again. Mackie stumbles back into the protective barrier. Adams uses the ropes to pull himself up but is now severely favoring his damaged lag. Mackie gets back up to and glares up at Adams who is beckoning Mackie back into the ring.)
Brutus: Again, dirty tactics by Mackie is turned a blind eye to by Pops.
Jimmy Rollins: Yes but does Pops have any eyes that aren’t blind?
Brutus: You think this is funny don’t you?
(Mackie just shakes his head and heads back up the ramp. Adams slides out of the ring to chase him but stumbles on his injured leg. Mackie continues to walk up the ramp and leaves ringside without even looking back. A disgusted Adams slides back into the ring and Pops calls for the bell.)
The Mic: The winner of this bout, as a result of a countout… “CLASS ACT” TREVOR ADAMS!
Brutus: I can’t believe that chicken just left. He knew where this match was going and he just didn’t want to feel any more pain.
Jimmy Rollins: I doubt that very much Brutus. Euan was very much in control of this one before his curious departure. I, for one, can’t wait to find out why the man left.
(The scene fades out as Adams yells at Mackie to get back into the ring while Mackie poses on the top of the ramp.).
Credits:
Match 1 - Lonnie Hash
Match 2 - Doug Wise
Match 3 - Jay Flanders
Match 4 - Jay Babstock